I can breathe again.

I’d rather hit rock bottom than drown on the way to getting there, because once I reach the bottom I have a stable surface again to push off from. From that stable platform, I can propel myself back to the surface and achieve a transformational breakthrough, I can breathe again.

The question then becomes, where is the bottom, and when will I reach it. What I find most interesting, is that for me, the bottom has never felt like a destination, but rather a decision. But, the decision requires self-awareness.

Unfortunately as humans, we are finely tuned to ‘put on a brave face’ or ‘fake it till we make it’ because it seems deeply rooted in our nature to not want to burden others with our problems, or to be perceived that ‘we can’t handle this’. So the decision that we’ve reached the bottom, will not be made by someone else.

So how do we tune in to the frequency of our consciousness? Slow down. Shut out the noise. Turn off the devices. Sit in the quiet, and just listen.

At first there is an incredible amount of internal noise that is noticeable. The internal critic asks ‘how did I get here’, the internal ego says ‘I don’t want anyone to know that I’m here’, and the rest of our pessimistic friends chime in with ‘you’ll never fix this’ or ‘maybe I just don’t deserve this’.

My response: ‘Who cares, I’m here now, and I can sit here and drown or I can seek the surface’.

The choice. The choice is the propulsion. The freedom of hope. The freedom to believe that this is just a single page, in a single chapter in the book of your life, and the remaining pages are unwritten. The decision to close this chapter perhaps, and begin a new one. The opportunity to pick up the pen and slay the dragon that is your internal critic.

With that pen I’d write these words on the next page:

I’m here, in this moment, and this moment I choose to leave expectations behind and begin leaning into my potential. I have limitless opportunities and only one life to live. From this moment forward I will live it like the gift that it is.